A highly polite bee

Today I learned that bees are polite.

The epiphany came in the middle of the night.

I heard my doorbell on the way to my bed,

“That’s a bit late” is what I thought and said.

I went down and opened the door,

And all I saw was darkness and hoar.

I thought a prankster had paid me a visit.

I thought “That ain’t fun, not at all, now is it?”

Then I saw the bumbliest bee

Floating in mid-air and glancing at me

And at the doorbell and at me again.

Five and a half minutes later was when

I gathered the plot of what’d taken place

The bee had buzzed so it could enter my base.

I didn’t wonder, the nights get cold,

So this voiceless dealer had me sold.

I preferred this to just barging in,

So enter it could, welcome within.

I prepared a plate with a drop of honey,

It had a sip and it looked at me funny.

Followed me as I went back to the bed

And lay down next to me as I read

The tales of Pooh bear’s and Piglet’s fright.

It lay quiet and listened, quite polite.


Species instructor

I’m a species instructor, I am,

From larvae to lobster to a tiny-winy lamb,

When a thing is born I tell them how to be,

Whether in the forest or under the sea.

What I tell them all is eat and mate,

Other stuff is gravy on the side of the plate.

I find they tend to listen quite well,

Because they’re young and they can’t tell,

If I’m full of hot air or much worse,

And if listening to me is more like a curse.

Some fish for example, I instructed to fly,

They spent all their energy jumping quite high.

After a while they all figured out,

They had been had, silly little trout.

I told some bunnies they should eat meat,

Let them loose and took the best seat.

I’ve never ever seen a squirrel move so fast,

As, on its favorite branch, it got harassed,

By a white fur ball, biting its tail.

This, too, was trumped by that one snail,

I told should find a house in a skull,

Which led to a confused laughing gull,

Who woke up with slime on its feathers of the face,

And a disappointed snail savagely on its case.

Some say it’s mean, and I should stop,

Ah, who cares, they’ll never be on top.