I stumbled in the kitchen while chopping up leek,
Cut my thumb deep with my antique.
The blood started spurting like a happy fountain
My heart rate started climbing like it was hiking on a mountain.
No one around knew any first aid,
Everyone I showed it to just got afraid.
I panicked and yelled “Help! Somebody, help!”
The TV came to life, powered by my yelp.
It stopped the bleeding, sutured the wound
Gave me a lollipop before my fear ballooned.
I asked astounded “How’d you know what to do?”
It replied “Ten seasons of ER would make you a doctor too.”