Sawdust in the air

I was sawing some planks into pieces today, and this started playing in my head to the tune of Walking in the air, composed by Howard Blake.

 

Sawdust in the air

Floating in the clear, blue sky

My lungs are full of it, as well as are my eyes

 

I already lost my sight

And it burns like hell, it’s true

The sky, it now looks brown, for me not perfect blue

 

The fungi and the mold

Have found their brand new home in me

Took over everything, from forehead to my knee

 

I cough blood in the night and I scratch my eyes

My throat is dry, my sheets are red, a wonderful surprise

 

Sawdust in the air

My head feels so very light

The noises far away, the lamps always so bright

 

The doctors say, it’s too late, what happens now, we know

I don’t believe, this is real, it can’t be my time yet to go

 

Sawdust in the air

Floating in the clear, blue sky

Like the sawdust did for me, the clouds are passing by

Sit to my left

I’ve been in a car crash, I’ve fallen from trees and rooftops; nowhere near as scary as the girl I fancy sitting next to me.

When I sit and breathe in class,

I feel like a great, big, sunken bass.

Slow and steady, never any rush.

My lungs pump slow, there’s a slight hush.

The air has no taste and it feels light.

My heart beats slow with a tenth of its might.

Once in four, ticks of the clock.

Tick tock tick tock, breathe, tick tock.

I feel calm and surprisingly attentive,

Not excited, angry or pensive.

Ready to learn, my mind feels deft.

You come in and you sit to my left.

My heart takes a dive,

Breath tastes of iron.

It stops for five,

Chest is set fire on.

Heart of lead beats six in one.

I can’t breathe, I want to run.

You so close destroys my core.

You far away just makes me sore.

My skin tingles, don’t dare to look.

Then you ask to borrow my book.

Sliding it over, our fingers touch.

Yank my hand back, the fire’s too much.

You say thanks and I peek at your eyes.

You look back and my heart cries:

”We can’t do it, we don’t have the power!

If you look again we’ll have a bloody shower!”

I look and lean away from your heat.

Your fragrant flower and my nose won’t meet.

To you my glances and voice so meek

(Brought to you by my Heart So Weak™)

Feel like I dislike you, or hate.

The damage is done and it’s too late.

My intention will not get through

It hurts too much to be next to you.

Eye contact and I expire,

Read your name and I perspire.

It’s not normal for a man full grown.

But whining won’t help so I’ll stop my moan.

(And stay alive by staying alone)