If you have a fear of a werewolf attack,
Or a vampire bite when you turn your back,
I have a tip that just might work,
It’ll show that mean, big, sharp-toothed jerk.
Dracula, for example, is scary and natty,
Quite mysterious and not too chatty,
But imagine him, flying around,
Without any pants, none to be found.
The bare, pale butt just gleaming in the night,
The village cracks up as soon as he takes flight.
No choice for Drac but to go to deep sleep,
Biding his time till the nudism sweep.
The same with the man of hairy variety,
Imagine him shaved, cold and full of anxiety.
Not so scary now, Mr. were-Chihuahua sir,
Go back to your home in the copse of fir.
If you’re afraid, feel free to try this trick,
It’s free and fun and quite the picnic.