In some movies with monsters and such,
People want to be like them too much.
Vampires or werewolves, doesn’t really matter,
They’ll serve themselves on a non-silver platter,
Become vampires free willingly or so.
I couldn’t say anything but “NO NO NO!”
Vampires can’t really go into the sun,
And I do think that tanning is fun.
Also, when I’m doing any kind of cooking,
You shouldn’t smell, but just stick to looking,
I use garlic more than pirates use rum,
Enough to lay a whole town on its bum.
Thus I can’t be a vampire of my own will,
No garlicky stews, the rest are just swill.
I wouldn’t mind taking the life of a stranger,
Not a second thought in the alley or the manger.
But frying veggies without the angel of taste,
Is like a turkey with water for a baste.
So, Mr. Dracula, please stay away,
Go bother others, if you please may.